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I recall that when I was 14, I had 14 people wish me happy birthday, and 15 when I was 15.
SO guess how many friends wished me happy birthday when I was 20?
According to the trend line, 20 right? right? NO.
ZERO 
FOREVER ALONE
all I needed was one person to wish me happy birthday. It’s okay, who needs friends when you have a lot of money, mangoes and stuff to busy yourself with.
***
all cos i have no facebook i guess :/ its like how people don’t remember other people’s phone numbers anymore after they simply store it on a contact list.
Maybe if I were a pretty girl, people would remember.
Losing my mp3 player for a short half an hour at work. Leaving work at 8pm at night under the nice moon. Taking a long night walk home after an eventful evening with a bit of alcohol and a lot of good food — not the same night as the leave work at 8 night of course! - Those are three things that I was planning to blog about in detail — but a bit sleepy by now.
Especially when I just met up with a friend I haven’t seen for a year, I’m left in a pensive mood. Probably with too much to say or express. Its all ineffable, and all ephemeral — but all still festering in my head. If I don’t blog, it means either I have nothing substantial in mind (as I’m too occupied with other trifles), or I have too much.
But I leave you with one thought: “People don’t change — they merely discover what they were.”
1. Life is quite simple. All I need after a long tiring day of work is an awesome dinner or a nice long shower. Preferably both.
2. Spending money on food you end up disliking and regretting is a cardinal sin. I’m fine with spending money. Its just the thought that the money + stomach space could have been spent elsewhere.
3. Once you’re pampered by a higher quality ramen, the rest is crass. Remind myself not to get ramen from that restaurant with a red shirt girl holding a bowl. The egg does not have the semi-fluid yolk. The noodles are more akin to chinese lamian at best. Every aspect from soup to meat is sub-par. Yes, I’m that picky.
4. Mango (as in the fruit, not the Bnand) ever disappoints. It concludes the day well – and tastes awesome regardless of whether its the sweeter or less ripe kind. It must be refrigerated though.
5. I think my body is programmed to feel hungry after I brush my teeth. dammit.
Constipation and insomnia suck. You could feel the repressment of natural rhythm. There is this overwhelming feeling of a futile struggle that is so close, yet so far. At times, the more you try, the harder it gets. (no innuendo intended).
But there’s one thing worse than constipation and insomnia — the combined force of sleep paralysis and severe diarrohea. Oh shit.
***
Question: which did I have when I thought of this post?
Today I spent my time at the end of the day watching (and maybe a bit more than that) my china friend, who doesnt really know English, fill up his citizenship test online.
A clarification (as usual):
That I am not commenting on the entirety of the selection process. There are many aspects to the application process that might be quite stringent i.e. interview or track record. I don’t know. I am commenting specifically on the online test of national education stuff that is taught in primary school social studies, and pointing out two loopholes.
.
Two glaring loopholes:
1. Loophole 1: The online test can easily be done by someone else, which defeats the purpose of such a test. I’m still wondering how a person who cannot read english could do the test. Joe Bloggs would do the test himself. Don’t do what Joe Bloggs would do.
2. Loophole 2: The online test is lax to the point that it allows tikaming. If you get Option A wrong the first time, you can just go back and press Option B – till C/D/whenever you get it right. Meaning to say, even if you do not process the knowledge tested, you can still pass. Joe Bloggs does not guess!
(Digression: I know I’m misusing and misrepresenting the Joe Bloggs test-taking strategy. There are Joe Bloggs questions though, and DO AS what Joe Bloggs would do)
Comparisons:
Putting Loophole 1 and Loophole 2 together, two harder tests come to mind:
a) The Maid English Proficiency Test (MEPT) – which is a test taken in person and involve maids giving up a lot, and flying to take the test personally in Singapore. This ensures no one takes the test for them.
b) The ORD quiz: one mistake and you have to restart the test. It prevents tikaming, and at least makes you think about each answer carefully. Even if you still tikam all the way, you would have repeated the entire fucking thing enough times for it to be burnt into your brain.
The two loopholes could be fixed easily. But that wouldn’t be too convenient to become a citizen, would it?
Further questions:
1. is the quiz even relevant to assessing who should become a singaporean?
2. does head knowledge define what it means to be singaporean?
3. Is it not enough for an immigrant to bring with him a set of economic contributions?
My personal belief is that the quiz doesn’t add much. It should allow someone to get over and done with quickly, and the loopholes allow it. The alternative would be a waste of time — or a freaking English test.
***
It’s not really called Maid English Proficiency Test right?
According to the Jakarta Globe, one sample size had only 5/50 maids succeeding. That is 10%. In comparison, the admission rate for Oxford PPE is 16.5%. Statistics is magick 
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